Unpublished Work © 2011 Cristina Carlino
Every good thought is a prayer. I believe that to be true. And to that expression , I add that every ‘not so good’ thought, if it comes from an open heart, is simply a prelude to a prayer. These are the thoughts in transition; learning, growing sometimes so slowly that we cannot see the changes. But still growing upward like a great, strong tree. The new thoughts, like leaves on a tree, come to our mind at the exact right time for each stage of our lives.
In my interactive journal, “Song of the Beautiful Beast,” in the lyric/entry “when did that tree become me?,” I wrote about the moment in my life when realities and thoughts of transitioning into middle life turned into a frightening crisis for me. I prayed for new thoughts. For the good thoughts. I feared growing older. And then I realized this was not a new fear. Our years, fears and thoughts of aging are for many years in the making.
For the big 30, you might think of pushing the P.A. (panic attack) button if you are a female and unmarried. For your 40th year and throughout that decade and beyond, you take up flirting with and trying to bargain with any options that might ensure your protection from anything like a midlife crisis. For the big 50, you become a card carrying member of AARP. By 65, it’s medicare and social insecurity.
And meanwhile, prayers are being answered. Answered prayers can come from the words of those who are much younger than us. The children in my life are my prayers. They tell me I smell good, that I am pretty and that I am the nicest mommy ever. They do not see a number or an old tree. And there are too the good words of those who have walked the road before us. Some of these you will find in Beautiful Beast.
There is a fountain of youth. It is your mind, your talents and the creativity you bring to your life and the lives of others you love.” – Sophia Loren
I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better.” – Maya Angelou
We turn not older with years, but newer every day. ~Emily Dickinson
The good words of others like the great trees I love, lead me back always from fear to faith. Like these by Albert Einstein. “Stand still. The Trees ahead and bush beside you are not lost.”
I could look at trees for the rest of my life and never be unhappy. When you figure out you are a tree of life with a beginning middle and end, you actually accept that life is beautiful no matter what age you are today.
I am older now. I want to be the old tree, the wise one people remember because either I was able to give them an apple or shade when they needed it. This is my good prayer.
Peace and Blessings,